Helping Your Children Deal With Your Divorce

(Part 2 of 2)

Divorce is a tough time for every family, but it can be especially hard for the children involved. Below are a few more tips for divorcing parents who are trying to help their child cope with divorce.

Answer questions to the best of your ability and listen carefully.

Your kids will ask a lot of questions as you go through the divorce process together. It is important that you try to answer the child’s questions, without being too negative. You should be honest, but remember some answers might not be child-appropriate. Take the time to listen carefully to your child’s questions and concerns. Your child is having a lot of feelings and thoughts and will need to express them, and will need to feel like you are receptive to his or her thoughts or feelings.

Sometimes, you are not the person your child needs to talk to.

While it might seem strange, sometimes your child will not want to talk to you about the divorce. The child might blame you, or might be scared that if he or she tells you about how he or she is feeling, you may not react well. It could be beneficial for your child to talk to another trusted adult, such as a grandparent, aunt or uncle or close family friend. Taking time to create a list of people your child trusts and asking those people to be a friendly listener if your child needs to talk could help your child cope with the divorce.

If talking isn’t working, try other modes of expression.

Children generally are happy, carefree and positive. So when a divorce happens to them, they sometimes lack the ability to communicate how and what they are feeling. Some children don’t understand how they feel, or may not know the correct words to describe how they are feeling. If your child is unable to verbally express how he or she is feeling about the divorce, you may want to try other forms of expression. Children are very good at drawing how they feel, and drawing could be a good way for your child to convey his or her thoughts or feelings.

Take time out to show your child that time with you will be just like it always was.

There should be an emphasis on how your child’s life is only going to change in that mom and dad won’t live together anymore, but everything else will remain the same. Children find it reassuring when they learn that their independent relationships with each parent remain the same. Love, support and having fun together all get this message across to the child. Helping your child with homework, playing games with your child and spending time together lets your child know that things will be all right.

Reaching Out to a Charleston Family Law Attorney

Children need a lot of love and support during a divorce. If you are seeking a divorce from your spouse and you have children that you are worried about, please do not hesitate to contact our Charleston family lawyers at Sarji Law Firm, LLC today. We can work with you to help minimize the impact your divorce will have on your children. Please contact us by calling 843-323-4341.