Ways That A Divorce Impacts Your Kids

Posted by Leslie SarjiJul 23, 20140 Comments

A divorce is difficult to go through. A relationship that used to mean so much to you might no longer bear the same joy that it once did. There might be an immense amount of strife between you and your spouse, which makes many situations unbearable. You might fight constantly, disagree frequently or have grown apart. Divorce can also bring about very sad emotions as it may feel like a chapter of your life is ending and that something you spent many years building is ultimately failing. These are all valid feelings and it is ok to have them.

Children involved in a divorce feel all of these feelings and more. And because each child is unique, he or she will react to and adjust to your divorce differently. Very young children are often the most flexible, largely because they may not be completely aware of what is happening. However, these young children often sense their parents' upsetness and frustration and can exhibit outbursts of crying and frustration as well. Young school-aged children are more likely to withdraw emotionally and socially in response to their parents' divorce. In some case, children in this age group will start to have serious behavioral problems and may even begin to defy authority figures.

Teenagers are more likely to exhibit signs of depression and withdrawal. However, older teens may not find divorce so disruptive to their lives since they are getting ready to flee the nest anyway. Getting their licenses, hanging out with friends who can drive, and getting ready for college all tug at these kids, and encourage them to focus on their future rather than their home situation.

How Divorce Affects Kids

The divorce will have a significant impact on your life and will also change your child's life. For instance, your child will:

  • Have to adjust to having parents that are no longer together;
  • Have less access to either parent at any given time, since many parents have to work more after a divorce to support their children and stay at the same standard of living;
  • Have to get used to living in two homes: that of the mother and that of the father. This means having two separate bedrooms, and dividing belongings between the two;
  • Have to learn a new schedule. When parents have split custody, the child will live with one parent part of the time and the other parent the rest of the time. This can be confusing for children, especially younger ones. A child might get on the school bus to his mother's house, when he was instead supposed to go to his father's house. If the child realizes his mistake, he could become very scared or upset; and
  • Have to get used to new family dynamics. There will be no more “go ask your mother” to break ties between parents' decisions. Instead, the child will have to get accustomed to one parent's instructions or rules compared to the other's. This can be problematic if one parent has lax rules while the other has very strict rules. The child may become resentful or spoiled.

Reaching Out to a Charleston Family Law Attorney

Divorce can be a trying time because everything is changing. Children often take the divorce of their parents extremely hard and may exhibit behavioral problems, withdrawal, or become depressed. They may be scared and insecure about the changes that they are going on at home.

If you are considering getting a divorce from your spouse and you have children that you are worried about, please do not hesitate to contact the experienced Charleston family lawyers at Sarji Law Firm, LLC today. Our divorce lawyers have handled numerous divorces and will consult with you as to how to minimize the impact of your divorce on your children. Please get in touch with us by calling 843-323-4341.

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